the takeover

well ... it has finally arrived. i have officially taken over my world.

i have ceased 'assisting' and have begun 'acting' as the manager. i find it odd that it doesn't feel odd. it feels easy and right, a natural progression. tomorrow, i may feel different, but, running away to the heart of the night ... i'm no longer afraid. i've practiced enough and i'm as ready as i'll ever be.

to think of it starts an obscure little camus passage playing round and round in my head ... 'a man's work is nothing but this slow trek to rediscover, through detours of art, those two or three great and simple images in whose presence his heart first opened. this is why, perhaps, after working and producing for twenty years, i still live with the idea that my work has not even begun.'

my work has not even begun. and i can't wait to see what happens next.

still, i will wear my big girl shoes. i will remember to breathe. i will remember to smile some and just listen awhile. i will be gracious. and i will shine.